Moon Song

I just had a 6 hour nap. Although, a nap is not a nap anymore after anything pushing 3 hours. Lets just say I had my first sleep. Haha.. and now killing time until I feel like sleeping again. Also need to study for rem pros tomorrow. Just cause I realise how little I know after almost a year of study in this area.

So- 3am and no ones awake.. What to do?

I hope I don't regret this..

Wanting to play for more people but always too shy to.. 

I sit there with the guitar/uke in my hands and just sorta but kinda not strum.. try to sing abit but get too embarrassed. 

Aside from my family I don't think I've played for many others, and even then it took me years to play anything while my parents were listening. haha.. That being said, that doesn't include the odd dental camp/ staff party tipsy jam sessions. Ah, fun times.

Anyway, no chance I'd upload onto Youtube cause .. people can be mean. So where better to show than my own blog? :)

Less chance of scrutiny, judgement, less people watching, less comment ability, no pressure to collect likes. LOL just like when I post on twitter as opposed to facebook. No one wants to hear my cool stories on facebook, but on twitter its just normal to cool-story, and people don't care. 

In my opinion the song sounded better on the uke vs my guitar, so I borrowed my brothers.

Haven't had much experience playing the uke.. I can play like 2 songs lul. Lucky for me its relatively easy to pick up the more simpler chords. 

First heard it on David So's youtube, where one of his friends sang while he played the guitar. Thought it was a cute song but didn't think much of it. Then Simon re-introduced the song cause he was learning it also. Hahah.. ofcourse I had to look it up and learn it too.. #crazygifs

Only listened to the song a couple times to get the gist, so I'm pretty sure I've got the melody wrong in about 6 different places, and the lyrics are quite possibly off also. HAHA oh well.. Got tired of singing after awhile.

Anyways, enough of my rambling- Happy Thursday! :)

Growing old

Hello lovely people!

Birthday celebrations need a blog post so here goes-

Happy birthday to meee! Well, its over now but.. the celebrations continue.

Had an epic hot pot with my family on the night of my birthday, organised a dinner with the high-school people Friday night, and spent most of Monday with my dental kids at a cute corner store cafe. 

And this Friday looking forward to having Viv and Shannon stay over at mine for a movie marathon! :D

A few photos for your perusing..

Super thanks to my Rosemay for organising the epic durian cake for my highschool dinner get-together..
Really meant alot to me, putting that much effort into my birthday. Besties for a reason.. ♥

21. People say this is the age where we finally reach adulthood. The age of responsibility. Me? I don't feel any different. Still the same crazy, immature, lame person I was 5 years back. Haha.. Good thing maybe?

I hope to be still fun even when I'm 80. 

I think the only thing thats changed is my thoughts about the future. Constantly thinking about it, and always thinking about how I can save up for it. I've started reading through my first property investment book. LOL. JUN? Thinking like an adult? What the actual eff.. haha 

I dunno, I was just talking to my parents about rental properties and decided to get a book off ebay. Stupid Jun. Could have just borrowed it from the library. Rookie mistake.. haha oh wells. Atleast I can take my time reading it.

Hopefully I'll be able to understand the process more and how to go about it, maybe get my foot in the door as soon as I graduate and find a job.

Job prospects have also been on my mind all the time.

Urgh. I just want a normal life with a cute cottage, epic husband and 3 kids. Is that too much to ask for!? Haha.. The answer is yes. That is a huge ask. And its something I need to work hard for, so hard work will be done. Mr husband, please work hard also, please be smart with your money and make better decisions than I do.

Other than that- the same durian loving, badminton playing, guitar strumming, noob of a girl.

Lost without you

So it finally happened, I lost my phone. We all knew this day would come. Anyone who knows me would tell you how much of a nob I am with my belongings, how everything I touch will instantly break or somehow turn into dust. I don't mean to be careless with my things.. I do try to be aware of my belongings and what I'm doing with them, where I put them, how I treat them. But with me, shit just happens. Clumsiness. lol. My family still calls me Ms. Drop. For obvious reasons. And I don't blame them. Haha.. Not something to be proud of, I have to say. Must address this issue before I have my first child, and accidentally drop him/her/it.
Anyways, what was I talking about?
Oh yea. Dropping things. This time instead of breaking my phone (cause it was already broken anywho), I lost it. It's probably super lonely on the 273, just chilling by itself. Poor phone. I'm sorry.
I really need to be more careful with my things. But then again, its not like I'm actively trying to lose/break/drop things.. So how to fix? Just keep trying I guess.
POINT IS. Facebook me if you need me. LOL. Cool story bro.

Forgot to mention- I passed all my exams. And also all my Clinic sessions. :D 4 written exams and 7 clinic sessions. Who would have expected me to pass them all? BUUUT I did it. And super proud of myself, really. I was so sure that I didn't have a clue. Maybe I need to have more confidence in how much I do know, how much I did study. I focused too much on the things I had yet to cover, the things I was unsure of. Which was good in a sense that I would strive to fill in the gaps of knowledge, but really made me feel super down.. alot of the time. Just thinking about the immense amount of crap I had not yet covered. But hey. Its over now. On to the next part. I must thank Simon for keeping me sane over the exam period though. I was literally about to blow. Support from friends, family, significant other is seriously one of the best possible feels. Just to know that there are people rooting for you to do well, people hoping for your improvements and success. Super good feels. :) Defs makes me want to try harder.

Badminton tournament on the weekend.. what can I say. First tournament in a long ass while where I did not win anything. No runner up, no plate winner, no nothing. Didn't get to win that pair of socks that I didn't even want. LOL. I don't feel so bad though. Its not a big deal to me anymore. I thought to myself.. I have two options. I either start trying harder and playing more, actually put effort into the sport like I used to.. Or just stop putting so many cares into my badminton care-cup.
At this point, badminton is very low on my list of priorities. Sure, I like having social hits every so often throughout the week, but I don't so much look forward to the competition side.
Who knows, maybe I'll change my mind. But for now I think my cup of care is running dry.
Table tennis anybody? LOL joke I'm ploppers at table tennis.

Happy Wednesday Everybody!  ♥

To party, or not to party

Waiting for my Tv eps to download before I cook my noodles so I thought this would be the perfect time to blog. "Jun, why don't you go and cook your noodles while you wait for your downloads to finish?" you ask?
Well, you probably did not ask but I'm TELLING YOU ANYWAY. ahaha
Cause when I prepare my food before my stuff downloads, which happens 70% of the time cause I just get too keen for food.. then I'm sitting at my desk- yes, I do eat in my room alot- and think to myself.."Damn. Should have waited til my Eps had finished downloading so I could watch as I eat." Instead, I start eating first and then later must watch the episode all alone, with nothing to do. I always feel like I could be doing something else while watching Tv.. I can't JUST watch tv, there are things to eat, books to read, objects to draw, projects to finish! :D
But yeah, that was a very cool story bro- I'm so sorry many thankyous.
On the plus side, my Eps are almost done! LOL
Efficiency Plus a hundred.

SO whats up? Finished my exams last week- and already a week of holidays has gone by.. So fast. One more week to go. Atleast I have victor harbour at the end of the week to look forward to!
Excited to take Simon's car for a long-awaited cruise, I'll get my fulls today or tomorrow I'm hoping, so I'll be able to do some of the driving. Haven't driven manual since his car got defected so I'm super looking forward! It'll be legal for me to drive it at last! Too much of a beast for P platers.

Oh hot damn. I always deny it, but maybe I do have a thing for cool cars. Prepping an awesome music track to play for the ride, and also all day long in the house cause there will be speakers there. Happy music. 90's music! Shieeet, them RnB feels.. I can't wait.

Its the 7th today, which means one more month until my birthday. I should be busy organizing a massive birthday party, like I had always wanted.. But I really, truely am not feeling it. And that should be enough to change it into something else right? Its not the usual excuse- along the lines of poor organizing skills coupled with laziness.. this year its more like- who do I even want to invite? and honestly I only want to invite a small group of people. I don't want a massive party full of people I don't even want to see, people I don't see much anyway, people who I know don't reeally wish me happiness, right?

Thinking hard about what to do now, leaning towards something small for my 21st.
They say to hold a huge one so that I don't regret it.. But why would i? If anything, I'll look back at my 21st and be glad that I spent it with only the people that matter.
What can I say.. if I'm not feeling it, I'm not feeling it.
Just like that saying- you can't choose who you love.
I'm choosing not to love throwing a big party. ahaha. First world dilemmas. ahh.

Done and done

Good news everybody, I'm finally done with exams :D Hah. Well, whether I did well enough or not is a whole other issue- we shall discuss that later if need be. Please buddha, let me have scraped through.

Just thought I'd make a quick update post- since I haven't in a while. Thats how much I was studying- I'd like to say. haha I definitely am the queen of procrastination. If you know me, you already know.

So I got round to watching The Fault in Our Stars a couple weeks ago- was really looking forward to it, since I did enjoy the book. In my opinion the book was alot better- but I say that about many films.

I think I just prefer reading it, the stories play out alot better in my head. And after that I have the highest expectations when the movie comes out, only to be disappointed!

Having said that, it was super touching.. well what story about cancer, family, relationships and death arn't? I'd still recommend watching it. Not mind blowing- but worth your while.. Will make you appreciate what you have, instead of always comparing yourself to others and wishing you had more.

We have enough :)

Well I certainly do anyways. Couldn't be happier at the moment. ..Can we just pause life here?

Alas, we cannot. So making the most of now, living life in the moment, all that jazz- really makes sense.

Before we know it, time will pass us by and we'll be thinking back to happier days.

LOL what a bleak way to look at the future.

Reality is, we don't know whats going to happen. It very well could be full of sad moments. When and if those times come, all lifes hardship and BS, we'll deal with it then.

This very moment though, I'm thankful for so much. Thankful for my parents, constantly looking out for me, worrying about me because I don't worry about myself- making sure I don't drink too many energy drinks, calling me to ask when I'll be home because the man on the telly predicted a thunderstorm..

Thankful for my friends, being there when I need them, for me to turn to when I need solutions, and when I'm freaking out about exams, want nothing more than to help me.

Thankful for good health, being able to run around, being able to do what I want.

Which reminds me- BADMINTON AWAITS :D hur hur hur.. I think this is the only exam period where I completely stopped playing badminton. 3weeks have passed and I've missed it each and every day. My heart has definitely grown fonder, and I'm super craving/aching to play.

Also- Victor harbour is coming- more memories to be made. Heeeells yea. 

Happy Holidays people! Take up a new hobby, do something different, clean up your room!

Insane in the brain

Feel like this is the most un-productive study period before exams that I've had so far. I knew this time would come. It's taken almost 4 years but yea, I may indeed bomb out on my exams.
I always say that I feel like I'm gonna fail, but I know that deep down I know what I'm doing.
This time? No idea. No idea what might happen, what questions might crop up, how shat I will do D':
Duh slightly worrying. lol. Never the mind. One more week.
I'm having the best time of my life.
Passed all 7 of my clinics WHAT UP!? haha.. But I've always loved clinic, definitely prefer it over theory.. well who wouldn't? I'm loving the hands-on, getting yo' hands dirty, getting into dem root canals :D weeee
Love it.
Finding more time for my family also, spending time with my parents as they wind down from work. It makes a difference, making sure I'm there at the right moments. Ofcourse, I'm still away from home quite abit, doing things for me.. but yea, I think I'm handling well.
Sort of paused with badminton, not really feeling it right now. But thats ok. It certainly doesn't mean I'm any less fond of it, but for now its not a huge priority for me. There are more important things :)
I'll get back onto it after exams.
Planning a victor harbour trip with my brother, Simon, and duh bro's girlfie ;) hahhah Not sure if I'm allowed to mention that or not but.. He doesn't read my blogs anyway. HAHA. What he does not know, shan't kill him. Can't wait!! Sure its only for 3days but, I'll be glad to get away from Adelaide for abit. Getting a little restless over hurr.
Definitely didn't have any reason/train of thought/good ideas for this blog post, simply posted cause I felt like ditching study for tonight and going straight to bed. And I would give myself that luxury but.. I did that last night.. and the night before. So I'm trying to keep myself awake.
LOL Its getting to the point where all this study is building up and I'm reaching the 'part-where-jun-panics'.
There is ALWAYS that part. It comes with every exam period. Inevitable. haha.. It slowly edges to a moment where I realise how much I don't know in comparison to everyone else, and one night when I'm just sitting at my desk, I'll start to hyperventilate and break down in tears. Anxiety, pressure, feelings of inadequacy.. Crazy I KNOW. I. have. issues.
In the past I've only really briefly mentioned it to one person, and when I told him, he told me to just take deep breaths. Actually breathe. I tell the same thing to my patients when I'm just about to give them a needle. "Give me a deep breath in through your nose for me.. and now out through your mouth. You're doing super awesome."
It really does help, as simple and as stupid as it sounds..
When the time does come, I just need to breathe. Then take a couple steps back from my books and realise how minuscule my problems really are. SO WHAT if I don't know the answer? I know the answers for other things. And even then, so WHAT if I end up doing badly? There will always be that opportunity to redeem myself. And passing that point, WHAT IF i end up having to re-do fourth year?
More years of dentistry, more experience before the real world right?
I'd much rather prefer having a dentist who re-did fourth year and aced it, than someone who barely scraped through and passed on supps.
That being said, I still want to pass it the first time round. LOL probs just trying to justify my reason for potential failure. COME ON JUN. You can do better than that. hahah..

Going to visit my grandma at the temple tomorrow. Long time no see, Grandma.. its been 5 years. Man, alot of time has passed since she passed away, so many things she would have been happy to have seen. Me getting into dentistry, her first great-grand-daughter being born, my brother getting married, Dad finally re-finding Grandpa's grave.. eurgh, the feels.

Happy Sunday people! ♥

Fall out

Ladies and Gentlemen, my apologies for being afk for so long!
Literally away from the keyboard since don't we all do things on our phones these days? lol..
All of a sudden its almost time for mid-year exams. In just over a year and a half I'll be graduating! (hopefully).
Scary to think what happens after graduation.. Sure I've got the degree and supposedly adequate 'skills' to be a dentist, but what if no one employs me? What if I'm unemployed for a long time? What if I need to move interstate for work? Overseas? Man. Its one of those issues I just push to the back of my mind every time it pops up. Why? Cause I'm scared. Scared of what the future holds. Scared of how much I DON'T achieve.
But ain't no body got time to be scared. Scared of spiders? Punch them in the face, nigeria please. Scared of clowns? Kick dem in the balls. Me.. scared of life? Ridiculous.
I need to have more confidence in myself, I really do. Game face on >:)
That being said, confidence really depends on how well you've developed your knowledge base. If you know your shit, you can be confident that whatever the situation, you'll know what to do.
So whatever you do do guys, (LOL she said doodoo) make sure you read up on it.

Clinic has been raping me up the arse without lube. Some sessions are not too bad, but today was stressful let me tell you.. Patients coming in with pain, wanting the pain to be removed.. Dear patient, stop being a pain in my butthole and remove yourself.
Ah, I must not be so harsh, so heartless.. But for real, your diet looks like something I'd eat if I was locked in a bloody Handorf lolly shop for 20years. Ofcourse your teeth would be 'effed', as he himself described it.
On top of the emergency care clinic, having to deal with dragon-lady tutor is not getting any better. Sure, I don't think I sound like an idiot, stuttering away anymore, but goddamn. Picks on literally everything I do, from standing in her way one time, to dot-pointing my self-assessment un-systematically. HOW is this relevant. WILL that make me a better clinician? jeebussssss.
Bad luck to my friend who accidentally crumpled the left hand sleeve of his clinic coat in his bag and got picked on for that. What the actual eff?
Enough ranting. ..For now. LOL.

What else has been up?
Lately I've kind of fallen out of the badminton group. Sure I still go to social from time to time, and I kind of HAVE to play tuesday nights cause well, dat crap is against my will lolol curse this 'nice person' thing I have to be.. Just kidding.
But yea, its just different now. Less friends, alot of judging and gossiping..side glances, snide remarks, awkwardness.. God damn it, if you want to know something, ask me directly. Why go behind my back and ask someone else? I'll TELL you whats up. THEN you may judge me.
It just happens so often now, its mind blasting.
When I was a junior, I used to go to badminton cause I was truely passionate about it, and it was really about the badminton. Socializing was a bonus. an awesome bonus. But as I've grown into the 'older' generation and started to hang with people 5-10 years older than me, I've discovered its not so much about the badminton as it is about gossiping, politics and stupid inside grudges. You'd think that they'd be older so they'd be more mature about things, keep out of other peoples business and have lives OUTSIDE of badminton. 'Hating' me when we've never even spoken just purely off something that you had heard.. thats a wonderful way to live, good job lady! *cue slow clap*
Nigga please, I don't even know who you are.

Sure you may not agree with the way I've handled things and the choices I've made.. But thats my problem, not yours. MY life, so let me live it the way I want to. Dealing with this sort of stuff, I dunno, I guess its out of my control- people think what they want, do what the feel like. If you can't win them over...just stand back and laugh at how much effort they're putting in to dislike you.
It's actually a conscious EFFORT to dislike someone, to hold a grudge, to react negatively to something/someone. I legitimately dont have the energy for that. LOL. I'd rather use that effort on-
♪ Loving youuuu, is easy 'cause you're Beautifullllllll ♥ haha LAMEEEEE.


I blog like I know what I'm doing, what I'm saying- but I don't really.
Happy Thursday everybody! Today you should do something that you love. Or someone. Either way. Do it good ;)