Having a little bit of a down moment right here people..
Eurgh. This feeling, I just can't seem to shake it.. Must be Whyalla.
It comes in waves. One moment I'm fine and just meh about everything, and then the next moment a huge wave of crap just washes over me and I'm left feeling so down. Like super down. The feeling like nothing is going right. Which is not true in the slightest, my life at the moment I couldn't be happier... Back in Adelaide that is. I love my life back in Adelaide.
I think that when I'm here away from home, I forget about how much love and support I have back there. And when I'm having a bad day or just dreading clinic with the frustrating tutor.. I forget that there is much more to life than trying to prove to the tutor that I'm not as incompetent as she thinks I am..
Just can't wait to get out of here.
I don't mind the place, I'm just not a fan of the tutor. She makes me feel like I can't do anything right, and just the way she has exaggerated small mistakes I've made, just takes away my confidence in my work and clinical skills.
I just can't seem to do things right after she's done bashing me mentally. It's a struggle to keep my chin up at times.
Worst feeling, feeling incompetent at something you once thought you were pretty good at.
Usually after a bad clinic experience or just after a super long day I always have people at home to make me forget it, cheer me up and then I smile again.. But over here I come home to an empty bedroom, just feeling alone. So dramatic. As usual..
I call home and call Simon but.. phone calls can't ever beat reassurance through hugs and cuddles hey?
And after the shitty day the last thing I want to do is go through the whole ordeal in my head again while explaining through the phone.
....3 more weeks. Wish me goodluck because I'll need it.
Friday, May 15, 2015
Forgot to mention, got my braces off about a month ago. It's been pretty great. Still have to wear the retainer for the upper arch pretty much all day and night, because it has a false tooth incorporated into the plastic retainer as a temporary gap-filler haha.. You can't tell when I'm wearing it though, that I have a fake tooth, which I'm super grateful for :)
Third one from the middle, on my left side.
Going to wait until I get back from Whyalla to make the appointment for implant placement though, don't really want to rush anything at the time being.
Pretty happy with the result. Although, it could have been avoided all together if the dentist had detected the issue earlier.
So my first week in Whyalla wasn't all sunshine and sparkles. Pretty drab and dull actually. So much so that I'm already back in Adelaide. Haha.. weak i know. But we had Thursday and Friday off clinic though, so I don't rekon there would be much to do had we stayed back. All four of us wanted to go back. Early sleep before 12 has been doing wonders for me though. I can actually hear my alarm in the mornings, and sometimes I wake up before the alarm goes off anyways. Crazy. HAhaha.. Like normal people do. But anywho. Maybe I should sleep earlier more often.
My tutor is .. hard to understand, I don't really know what she wants. Very inconsistent in her expectations. Sometimes shes happy sometimes she picks on every little thing.. It's weird. Hard to get my head around, but yeah.. I'll suck it up and deal with it. What else can I do? Haha..
Shes pretty much the reason why I don't want to be in Whyalla. But maybe I'll get used to it. Who knows ..
Finish clinic, make dinner, watch TV whilst studying at the same time, and go to sleep. Pretty much our daily routine. Once went down to the beach and drove around town.. but thats about all there is to do in Whyalla. :P
Plus Pokemon Monopoly! LOL. Finally, for the first time ever owned the 'Mayfair/ParkLane' of Pokemon, Nidoking and Nidoqueen. From there on.. well ofcourse I won ;) Whut whut in the butt.
THAT bored, that we played monopoly..
Until the next week in Whyalla, people :)
Sunday, May 10, 2015
Five weeks of rural placement in Whyalla. Doesn't sound like much but.. I'm already counting down the days until its time to go back! Haha.. Enjoying the free time though. With no badminton to play or family to spend time with, there sure is alot of time to waste. It's only 8pm, I've already had dinner, showered, watched abit of Game of Thrones, went grocery shopping, and organized my new temporary bedroom. ..And now wondering what to do next..
Starting the rotation tomorrow, errday 8:30am, not too bad considering the clinic is only about 5 minutes walk from the accommodation.
Thinking of how I'm going to spend my time. I'm hoping it will encourage me to study more... LOL Yeah, right.
Probably try to blog abit more frequently, seeing as my blogs have been suuuuper delayed and uneventful. ahah..
Outside looks pretty Salisbury-esque, so my plan to go running around the neighbourhood is in shambles. Maybe try to do some in-room starjumps..
Already missing Simon.Time goes by incredibly fast when I'm with him, and without him its just like tick...tock........tick.............tock.
How lameeeeee. Can't wait til he comes to visit :'D
Definitely heading back to Adelaide for the first dent pubcrawl of the year though, super keen. Long time no pubcrawl and I'm really missing the dance vibes.
Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, by the way. Couldn't spend the day with my mum today since we had abit of a long drive to get here today, but woke up early to prepare breakfast for mum :) Hope she felt the love. Pancakes with maple syrup, whipped cream, mangoes, peaches, pear, apple, banana, strawberries, blueberries and dark chocolate melted on top. Not all at once of course, but the options were there.
All mothers go through so much.. and yet they still manage to keep their shit together and take care of you, be there for you regardless of the circumstance.
Hope you all spoilt your mums today. :)