Having a little bit of a down moment right here people..
Eurgh. This feeling, I just can't seem to shake it.. Must be Whyalla.
It comes in waves. One moment I'm fine and just meh about everything, and then the next moment a huge wave of crap just washes over me and I'm left feeling so down. Like super down. The feeling like nothing is going right. Which is not true in the slightest, my life at the moment I couldn't be happier... Back in Adelaide that is. I love my life back in Adelaide.
I think that when I'm here away from home, I forget about how much love and support I have back there. And when I'm having a bad day or just dreading clinic with the frustrating tutor.. I forget that there is much more to life than trying to prove to the tutor that I'm not as incompetent as she thinks I am..

Just can't wait to get out of here.
I don't mind the place, I'm just not a fan of the tutor. She makes me feel like I can't do anything right, and just the way she has exaggerated small mistakes I've made, just takes away my confidence in my work and clinical skills.
I just can't seem to do things right after she's done bashing me mentally. It's a struggle to keep my chin up at times.

Worst feeling, feeling incompetent at something you once thought you were pretty good at.
Usually after a bad clinic experience or just after a super long day I always have people at home to make me forget it, cheer me up and then I smile again.. But over here I come home to an empty bedroom, just feeling alone. So dramatic. As usual..
I call home and call Simon but.. phone calls can't ever beat reassurance through hugs and cuddles hey?
And after the shitty day the last thing I want to do is go through the whole ordeal in my head again while explaining through the phone.

....3 more weeks. Wish me goodluck because I'll need it.

Rural feels.

Forgot to mention, got my braces off about a month ago. It's been pretty great. Still have to wear the retainer for the upper arch pretty much all day and night, because it has a false tooth incorporated into the plastic retainer as a temporary gap-filler haha.. You can't tell when I'm wearing it though, that I have a fake tooth, which I'm super grateful for :) 

Third one from the middle, on my left side. 

Going to wait until I get back from Whyalla to make the appointment for implant placement though, don't really want to rush anything at the time being.

Pretty happy with the result. Although, it could have been avoided all together if the dentist had detected the issue earlier.

So my first week in Whyalla wasn't all sunshine and sparkles. Pretty drab and dull actually. So much so that I'm already back in Adelaide. Haha.. weak i know. But we had Thursday and Friday off clinic though, so I don't rekon there would be much to do had we stayed back. All four of us wanted to go back. Early sleep before 12 has been doing wonders for me though. I can actually hear my alarm in the mornings, and sometimes I wake up before the alarm goes off anyways. Crazy. HAhaha.. Like normal people do. But anywho. Maybe I should sleep earlier more often.

My tutor is .. hard to understand, I don't really know what she wants. Very inconsistent in her expectations. Sometimes shes happy sometimes she picks on every little thing.. It's weird. Hard to get my head around, but yeah.. I'll suck it up and deal with it. What else can I do? Haha.. 

Shes pretty much the reason why I don't want to be in Whyalla. But maybe I'll get used to it. Who knows ..

Finish clinic, make dinner, watch TV whilst studying at the same time, and go to sleep. Pretty much our daily routine. Once went down to the beach and drove around town.. but thats about all there is to do in Whyalla. :P

Plus Pokemon Monopoly! LOL. Finally, for the first time ever owned the 'Mayfair/ParkLane' of Pokemon, Nidoking and Nidoqueen. From there on.. well ofcourse I won ;) Whut whut in the butt.

THAT bored, that we played monopoly..

Until the next week in Whyalla, people :)

Counting down the days.

5 weeks.

Five weeks of rural placement in Whyalla. Doesn't sound like much but.. I'm already counting down the days until its time to go back! Haha.. Enjoying the free time though. With no badminton to play or family to spend time with, there sure is alot of time to waste. It's only 8pm, I've already had dinner, showered, watched abit of Game of Thrones, went grocery shopping, and organized my new temporary bedroom. ..And now wondering what to do next..

Starting the rotation tomorrow, errday 8:30am, not too bad considering the clinic is only about 5 minutes walk from the accommodation.

Thinking of how I'm going to spend my time. I'm hoping it will encourage me to study more... LOL Yeah, right.

Probably try to blog abit more frequently, seeing as my blogs have been suuuuper delayed and uneventful. ahah..

Outside looks pretty Salisbury-esque, so my plan to go running around the neighbourhood is in shambles. Maybe try to do some in-room starjumps.. 

Already missing Simon.Time goes by incredibly fast when I'm with him, and without him its just like tick...tock........tick.............tock.

How lameeeeee. Can't wait til he comes to visit :'D

Definitely heading back to Adelaide for the first dent pubcrawl of the year though, super keen. Long time no pubcrawl and I'm really missing the dance vibes.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, by the way. Couldn't spend the day with my mum today since we had abit of a long drive to get here today, but woke up early to prepare breakfast for mum :) Hope she felt the love. Pancakes with maple syrup, whipped cream, mangoes, peaches, pear, apple, banana, strawberries, blueberries and dark chocolate melted on top. Not all at once of course, but the options were there. 

All mothers go through so much.. and yet they still manage to keep their shit together and take care of you, be there for you regardless of the circumstance. 

Hope you all spoilt your mums today. :)

Final Year Dental Camp

My absolute last dental camp ever.. Obviously I had to go. Haha.. I'll miss this when its all over. The parties, the drink-ups, the ease of making friendships with the girl taking a leak in the next cubicle just cause I get lonely in there.

Dental camp has always been the best event of the year. Why wouldn't it be? No limits out there in the wild. Haha.. This time it was at Victor Harbour, and although it was a two day, two night event.. I only joined in on the second night.

I didn't want to miss out on Saturday's work shift.. and also didn't want to be away from Adelaide for two nights. .. I tend to miss people after a day. Absolutely PATHETIC I know! But hey, the honeymoon period is still going, and I'm not one to complain. :)

One thing I WILL complain about though, is the lack of fun-times this dental camp.

No, I don't think the issue is because I'm not single anymore. I can't put my finger on it, but it might have been something to do with the crappy organisation.. or because people weren't being ushered into the hall- instead they kinda just chilled out in their cabins or outside on the grass.. or maybe cause this year's 1st years are total buzz-kills.

Whatever the reason, I was super disappointed at the turn out. And even more-so because I kept telling my group of friends who hadn't been before that dental camp was the best thing on Earth.

Needless to say they were kind of confused when it turned out to be not close at all, even to the best thing in Victor Harbour. 

The dance floor was pretty dismal, half the time pretty much empty. I used to have trouble breathing due to the sheer amount of people on the dance floor. You used to only be able to move in the vertical axis, I kid you not. This time I could have run laps and maybe play badminton in all the free space. You can imagine now the level of sadness.

Still, I was really keen on dancing, cause after all what else did I come here for!?

So I pushed a few friends on the dance floor and it wasn't so bad really. I still got my dance on. Not that I can dance.. but you know, just me jumping around with my arms in the air, singing my face off. 

In the end I did enjoy myself, but just disappointed in how different camp has gotten since I had been there last. And my last one ever, too! :(

Was glad to be back in my bed the next day. That night I think I had one of the worst sleeps ever. In the driver's seat of someone else's car, with a super bright LED outdoor light shining in my face the whole night, waking up every so-often to open the door and vomit. Not my finest moments. It got to the point of vomiting pure bile, which isn't pleasant to say the least. My throat and mouth were left burning, my teeth felt chalky and the taste... it was like I just drank a bottle of petrol.

Tequila is not your friend.

After the third time waking up I prayed to buddha that morning would come. WHERE ARE YOU, SUN!?

So.. that was my fantastic experience. Haha.. Making an effort to go to all the events this year. After all its my last chance hey? No regrets ;)

Picture time.

OMG TOTALLY FORGOT, I actually re-united with my best-friend Jishnu back in Reception/Year1.. HAHA was the best feels cause he was super excite when he realised who I was as well. Knew my name still!! Best feels because I used to be the biggest loner in primary school. Only had like 1 or 2 friends.. and yea, he was it. LOL. Man, who knew. He's 2 years below me though because I skipped Year 7 and then he did a year of something else after Highschool. Super coincidences :) So awesome. ANYWHO. I'm out. :D

Train of thought

Hey Pooper scoopers, how you doing?
I've got a little over a week left of holidays til I go back to uni. I'm actually itching to go back and see my patients again. As difficult as some of them may be, I miss the feeling of achieving things, whether its a good amalgam filling or a nice alginate impression. The feeling of improvement always makes me happy. I'm definitely going to be rusty when I get back into the clinics though.

Started playing badminton more and more these past few weeks. Just feel so fat and floppy if I'm not playing often. My back and neck pains are taking a toll on me though, I wake up in the morning feeling like P-Diddy. LOL joke. sorry so lame. But really, when I wake up I feel like I've been hit by an elephant. My neck is always so sore. Am I really getting old? D: Will see how it goes during normal clinic days, I'm kind of dreading it. What am I going to do if its unbearably painful?
Shall see a physio soon to make sure I'm all in check.

Simon is off to Coober Pedy AGAIN for work tomorrow, he'll be gone for about three days. Ofcourse I feel sad that I don't get to see him for three days- who else is going to annoy me with their quirks and all the wonderfully lame jokes- but then I compare it to Zhen, who has to go without seeing his other half for MONTHS at a time. Months. Wow. A huge thumbs up to my dear brother and his girlfriend in Malaysia.
I've always told myself that I would never do long distance, and that statement still holds true. Maybe its a girl thing, but I don't think I could handle not seeing each other for such long periods at a time. It would absolutely kill me. I need the physical and emotional support, the hugs after work when I'm feeling like ass.. being able to call him when I need to, whether its to talk, to rage about the ass-wipe at work, or to pick me up when I don't feel like taking the bus when its 40 degrees out. Man, I sound like a princess.
Far from it Ladies and Gentlemen, if anything, I'm a dude. People constantly tell me that I act like a guy, and I don't mind it one bit. I like being who I am, doing what I like to do, sitting with my legs up on the chair. Haha.. The guys at work always love it when I'm working, cause they know that they can get things done fast when I'm around. Other girls shy away from the labour but I always offer to do it for them. Carrying the heavy boxes, mixing cans and cans of tuna, cutting all the vegetables for the next 4 days. Man. it gets so tiring I have to admit. But I kind of enjoy it. Having something to do while Simon is busy at work makes the day go by super fast! Then we get to hang out all over again.
Anywho, super off topic arn't I. The way my mind works sometimes..
The point is...
What was the point..? HAHA.
The point is that.. I'm gonna miss him, Long distance is crabsticks and I'm a dude. Yup. That sums it up pretty well, don't you think? :)

Enjoy the rest of your holidays errbody!

Resolution.

A super late happy new year to you all :) Did you make any resolutions for 2015?

Surprisingly I did not, and I'm not too sure why. Pure laziness maybe thats why, haha.. Damn. Older and not wiser, but lazier and a continual growth of my love for sleep.

Literally get home from work and crash, fall asleep for a few hours and wake up to maybe play some badminton or watch a movie if I feel like it..

Uni is starting in a little over 2 weeks time. On one hand I'm excited to start uni again, but on the other hand it scares me.. Such little time left, so much to learn and remember.

A bit sad that I didn't get to go anywhere outside of Adelaide for my holidays.. Partly my fault cause of the lack of planning and my 'meh' approach to organising anything. A little part of me feels like the holidays have been wasted, having been spent entirely in one place. Whilst my friends are off in Nepal, Bangkok, Malaysia, Cambodia, Taiwan, Korea.. I'm just flopping around the house, waiting for my next shift at the sushi store. Lol. Sadness to the max when I think about it like that. Oh wells.. next year...

So whats new? I used the money I saved up over the holidays to buy myself a laptop. After alot of debate, Simon insisted that he pay for half- Which I do feel very grateful and appreciative of- however its a different feel from buying something yourself with your own hard-earned cash. I really wanted to pay for it all, to be able to say 'Yes, I worked hard for this'- like my guitar, the first thing I ever purchased with money that I had earned. Haha.. Simon is definitely way too generous!! Not complaining though :) Appreciate him more and more errday. Cheese to the max.
Been wanting one for ages. I used to have the Surface RT, the earliest, oldest model available off gumtree cause I'm cheap with technology like that.. Thought to myself I'd use it alot since its so lightweight and easy to carry around uni.. Nekminit hardly ever use it cause its so confusing with all its touch screen-ness and its shitty keyboard... How to even take fast notes!? Haha first world uni student problems, getting too old for this. So with some help I decided on a fuss-free, super fast processor, nice keyboard and ofcourse, cool-looking light little 13'3 inch. Love it so far.. Can't get enough. Shall treat it like its my baby. Maybe even give it a name. I'll let you know and keep you updated for sure. ahahha.. ghey.

On second thoughts with the resolution thing.. There is probably one thing I'd like to try and 'resolve' or work towards improving upon this year..
And that would be my tone of voice. Tone of voice can make a huge difference in every situation. It can turn a tease into an argument, a suggestion into an accusation, a critique into a fight. Not that I've been in heaps of fights before haha but I have noticed that my tone of voice can get quite serious very quickly, and I do raise my voice at the drop of a hat, instead of keeping my cool and being calm and collected, non-judgemental and polite.
Could be cause I'm so tomboy that I've become accustomed to just speaking my mind, but I think it does affect those closest around me, my family and my other half.
I've come to notice how the WAY people say things sometimes hurt not because of the words they are saying, but HOW they are saying it.

Need to stop and think about how I handle things once in a while, hey?

Ho-ho-holidays

MAN it has been an age and a half since I last posted.. What can I say? No feels to post. Too busy I think haha.. So what has happened in the last month or so?

Well for starters I managed to pass 4th year. Thinking back on it all..How did I do it?! I don't even quite know. 

So thankful to the people that supported me throughout. Couldn't do it without you all.

I was super over the moon about my results because surprisingly they were the best results I have had since I started, and in the most difficult year as well!? And in the only year where I brought a boy home to my parents? Must mean that he's a good influence ehy? ;) hahha We were both actually scared that if I failed then my parents would think hes no good for me. Welp, no need to worry about that anymore. Mum and dad, I've got a good one.

One of my close friends failed though sadly, and I'm sure a few others also. Having to re-do fourth year is.. unimaginable. I don't think I'd be able to do it again. Like when I did the Umat, I told myself that if I don't get through it in that year, I wouldn't try again because I simply couldn't put myself through it again. The amount of time and effort and not to mention tuition fees put into year 12- wow. Traumatic. lolol 

Exactly my feels for fourth year. Who knows what I would have done if I failed. Cried my eyes out first and foremost ofcourse.

But not to worry. Its all over :) BRING ON FIFTH YEAR! I'm pumped.

The whole of December I spent alot of my time working. So much so that I started to dislike going to work. Who reeally wants to work on Boxing day? But then when I have days off work and I'm able to spend them however I want- hiking, badminton, hanging with friends, enjoying the moment- I feel like Its all worth it. Would I enjoy my free time if I had it ALL the time? Work makes me really make use of the time I have to just chill out and do what I want. So its really not a bad thing :)

Merry Christmas for last Thursday by the way people :) It was a nice one. Spent with my parents and Simon. Too bad both my brothers weren't in Adelaide for Christmas, would have been good to have the whole family around. Zhen is coming back tomorrow from Malaysia though! Excite! I actually miss him alot. Sibling bond strong.

Anywho, we cooked Christmas dinner and finally for once got my dad a present that he likes and will actually use. Chrome cast- cause my dad is so tech savvy these days. Allows you to play things off your laptop/phone/tablet and cast them onto the big screen via Chrome. Super awesome. Spent the rest of the night watching the Dubai badminton world championships. haha ofcourse we would. Asians.

Vegetarian lasagne made with three different cheeses. Asparagus, broccolini and pumpkin on the side ;)

To sum it all up, I've been having a good holiday so far :) Got home from crabbing at Thompson's beach not too long ago- first time raking for crabs. So tiring! And super sun-burnt. But hey, where the fun without a little risk. Risk of skin cancer... ok maybe not so fun. 

Happy Holidays everybody! New years coming up soon- have you made your New years resolutions!? I need to get on it.