Thursday, September 11, 2014

Bad day

I'm glad dear Daniel Powter made the song Bad Day a good one. Such good feels. Reminds me that my problems really arn't that bad, and that by tomorrow it probably won't even matter anymore. I instantly start singing the song in my head when I see the words bad day. Or when I'm having one.
Which was like today.
This morning rather..
Just when I feel like I'm improving and getting on the tutors good side, I go and eff it all up.
Why was I so slow today? Why did I have so many problems doing the most simple things!?
I always think to myself "The odds must have been against me", whenever I have a bad clinic session.
Again, making excuses for my slip ups, for my lack of time management, for my lapse in judgement.

Bad days are good.
They kick me in the face and tell me to wake up a little bit more each time. ahhhh.

I can't even explain how stressed out I was this morning.
I started off so positively, thinking only good thoughts, planning out every little thing I was going to do..
The instant one thing goes a little south, I do another thing that makes me think to myself - What. am. I. Doing.
And then its all downhill from there. Such a vicious cycle. Theres no coming back.
3hours later, I'm still sitting there trying to construct a temporary crown for the third.. fourth.. fifth time. Things just keep going wrong. This shit never happens in the lab.
I couldn't count the number of times I thought about just flipping the table and telling the tutor to screw off. For one, why must you constantly talk down on me infront of the patient? Definitely benefits zero people involved. I'm already about to blow and instead of flicking me a couple words of encouragement, why not just intense-stare me more and bombard me with questions?
I felt like crying exactly twice.
Thats two more than I have ever felt like crying in clinic ever.
I'm usually quite level headed in clinic. I rarely panic or lose my shit. But today, oh man. I don't even know.

To make things worse- no lunch, and rushed straight to emergency unit for the afternoon session. To see more patients. Yes.. I know. Whinge whinge whinge.
I wonder if this is what its going to be like in the future. I guess these things will happen.
What can you do?
Just take a couple deep breathes and tell yourself to get your shit together. New patient, fresh start. OK.

Enough with my rage about my day.. I just had to get it out there.
In other news..

The Show on Sunday :) The only thing thats getting me through this On-week. Eurgh.. Sunday come sooner.
Also my parents are leaving to holiday in 2weeks, YET AGAIN without me D: haha I don't so much mind anymore though. I have people here to take care of me. heh. Not that I can't take care of myself. But its nice to know theres someone to lean on when I need. A super good feeling. Like nebber before.

Time to get some shut eye. Glad the day is over. :D
Have a good day tomorrow, peeps :)) And remember. No matter how bad your day might be. Someone, somewhere in Clinic 1.2 fixed pros on Wednesdays will be having a worse day. lol.

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